Naming a car is important business. Get it right, and you create not just a sales success but perhaps even a cultural icon. Think Ford Mustang, Volkswagen Beetle or Lancia Stratos. There’s Chevrolet Corvette, Dodge Viper, Lamborghini Diablo and Ferrari Testarossa – all sounds you’d proudly have come out of your mouth when telling someone what car you own.
But sometimes, car companies get it wrong. Very wrong. In this article, we give you the five worst car names we’ve encountered – with more than a few dishonourable mentions at the bottom.
Ford Probe
Produced between 1988 and 1997 in the USA – with a few sold in Australia along the way – there was nothing quite as thrilling as inserting yourself into the Ford Probe. The Probe took on other front-drive sports cars like the Toyota Celica (which could have also made this list) and Honda Prelude.
Mazda Titan Dump
Not a car, but we can overlook its status as a small truck to include it on this list. Sold in Japan, we’ll spare you the puns on the Mazda Titan Dump save to say we hope it did a courtesy flush and left the fan on afterwards.
Geely Beauty Leopard
Everybody and every car is beautiful in its own way, except perhaps the ironically named Geely Beauty Leopard. Looking from the front like it’s a bit unsure where it is and how it got there, the Beauty Leopard was produced between 2003 and 2006 and came with a very un-leopard-like 88kW 1.8-litre four-cylinder engine.
Honda Life Dunk
You know you’ve made it when you’ve taken delivery of your Life Dunk. A tiny Kei-class car sold in Japan, the Life Dunk debuted in 2001 with a turbocharged 658cc inline-three engine. Honda discontinued the name for the car’s fourth generation, and introduced instead the Happy Edition.
Dodge Charger Scat Pack
A potential reference to what might happen in any occupied passenger seats when all 807 horses of this rear-drive, Hemi V8-powered sedan are unleashed at once. The Scat Pack, in the 2024 Charger’s case, comes with 20 by 11-inch wheels, Brembo six-pot front calipers and plenty of Dodge-branded air fresheners (hopefully).
Dishonourable mentions (in no particular order):
Mitsubishi Pajero. There’s a reason it’s called the Montero in North America, Spain and Latin America – Pajero means ‘wanker’ in Spanish.
Build Your Dreams Sealion 6. Just released in Australia. Confuse people when they ask what car you just bought.
Mitsubishi Mum 500 Shall We Join Us. That’s its actual name.
Audi E-Tron. E-Tron means excrement in French.
Honda Integra Hi-Glad Style. Need we say more.
Mitsubishi Toppo Big Joy Guppy. We’re not even sure where to start here.
Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce. You don’t win friends with salad, Mitsubishi.
Honda Vamos Hobio Travel Dog. Not a good boy at all.
Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard. How it ended up with this name is a mystery.
Honda That’s. That’s it, that’s the name.
Hyundai Getz. Getz outta here.
SSC Tuatara. Rolls off the tongue… like a lump of peanut butter.
Did we miss any bad or just plain weird car names? Let us know in the comments or join the discussion on social media…
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